A Photo Recount of A Birthday for the Record Books

A photo (and video) recount of one of the best birthday's to date.

Awaiting me in my inbox was a video that simultaneously horrified and warmed my soul.

Careful when you start thinking what's already presented itself can't be topped. I was greeted at the office with an overabundance of tourism love.

And slid right into a whirlwind weekend filled with a lot of these...

And these...

And these... with some of Arizona's finest, of course.

Why stop there? I decided to defy age with a morning hike up Camelback Mountain.

At the top -- with a euphoric feeling of accomplishment.

I am blessed beyond my merit. If the inundation of love I received for my birthday is any indication of the year ahead, it should be quite the year. Here we go, 27!

"Live Slow"

There's a distinct disposition in Phoenix come late April that feels a little bit like black Friday.  The weather is still gorgeous. The sun-filled days extend to nearly 14 hours. And everything is in bloom. Slowly, the panic seems to set in as we realize our days of this glory are numbered, and all at once -- the most important thing to do is enjoy as much of it as quickly as possible. As every ticking second passes, the summer could hit. Most of the city seems to operate in a near-panic, filling up hiking trails, outdoor patios, open-roofed stadiums... even sidewalks. 

Naturally, I've been playing my part as a crazed Phoenician, even putting in overtime on my front patio most nights. And it was in this very outdoor frenzy that I came across a rather offensive t-shirt slogan. There I was, minding my own business in a hike up the Squaw Peak trail, tuned into a witty podcast on Lady Pilots, and otherwise enjoying the lovely weather. My pace was slowed by a hiker refusing to let me by and I noticed the back of her t-shirt - "Live Slow." 

Beside the phrase being a disgraceful grammatical slur, I also found myself disagreeing with the intention of it quite a lot. "Live Slow." In my daily life, I mostly dislike slow anything: slow people, slow drivers, slow hikers (ahem – lady), slow talkers, slow check out workers, slow technology, slow songs, slow-to-dry finger nail polish... the list could go on and on and on. What bothered me too though, was that it seemed what she was really trying to get across was actually to enjoy life, but if you really “live slow,” by the time you get to wherever it is you’re going, aren't you actually going to have less time to enjoy whatever it is you're doing? Come on.

Or maybe, her slogan was a play off of Lance Armstrong's Live Strong. That’s even more annoying.  

I was finally able to make my way around this lunatic, but not her irritating message. I started wondering about the types of individuals who wear t-shirts for the sole purpose of a personal manifesto. And when they do – is that message intended as a reminder for themselves, or as a pontification for an innocent passerby? 

In any case, she deserves a big F minus. #FAIL #GoBackToEnglishClass 

Turn on Your Easter Hazards

This year's Easter holiday offered no shortage of adorable photos of the many children somehow intertwined into my 20 something existence. There were several of my boss' sophisticated and upper echelon children. Some of my girlfriends' youngsters. Namely though, the Easter weekend (and technology) delivered a home video of my amazing and ingenious redheaded nephew, Marcus, interacting with several inappropriate chicken people. Each were dressed in yellow chicken suits (suspicious) and flapping their polyester wings, all the while releasing chicken noises and embracing each innocent child to stumble upon their chicken path.

I don't trust this at all. Thus, I've drafted a list of questionable Easter activity, mostly for my nephew and his OVERLY trusting parents, but also for those of us that just seem to be naive to the dangers of our modern-day society. Beware of:

1. Chicken suits

2. Bunny suits. Need I resort back to the terrifying Easter bunny from last year? Or to this guy?

3. Subjects in over-the-top pastel hues
4. Marshmallow Peeps, and the cult-like culture surrounding them. Ever heard of Peepshi? Gross.

5. Super enthusiastic Easter egg hunt guides

6. Really, anyone in costume whose identity is [literally] masked

Not to put a damper on the holiday as a whole, or anything. 

A Post on a Post

Since I seem to have absolutely nothing interesting to say these days, instead of try to find something curious in the couch cushions, or from my daily state government shenanigans, I thought it much more valuable to share something an old friend passed along. He seemed to think a letter like this one might be pretty close to what I'd send if I ever decided to become a parent.

I'll take it. Brace yourself for Fitzgerald's brilliance and truth. Also, I'd really like it if people started referring to me as "Pie."

http://www.lettersofnote.com/2012/03/things-to-worry-about.html