31 Kids Who Are Too Clever For Their Own Good

One of my closest friends is a teacher, so when she passes along forwards, I can't say I always enjoy the children's moments to the level she does (sorry, Focker). That said, she hit it out of the park today with one of her forwards. Dare I say -- one of the funniest all year? Perhaps I'm just in a laughing mood...

http://www.buzzfeed.com/expresident/kids-who-are-too-clever-for-their-own-good

Most notable: Doughnut Conspiracy Kid, and the Emo Poet. Or, mafia kid. Brilliant!

A Moment of Magnificence

I was a little out of touch with reality as I sat in traffic tonight. I was mostly focused on the burning sensation coming from my abs and legs (thank you half marathon training), and relishing in the onset of a wine buzz compliments of the grocery store tasting kiosk. I made the decision to indulge in a few samples alongside a 90-year-old woman with a near 90-degree posture, and a hispanic woman who looked like she'd had as tough of a week as myself. The three of us gave an air toast with our plastic sample cups, and I departed from my local Safeway with two bottles of expensive wine I otherwise wouldn't have purchased.

Windows cracked and red wine now occupying my passenger seat, the traffic eased a bit, and I arrived at the traffic light nearest my house. And there was something about this particular moment that felt really good. Almost like a crescendo of sorts -- the sun was setting, signifying the end of a week that did a number on me. And I was sore. But it felt good, like I took on the world. Like I endured it, and emerged victorious. Like... oh my god... is that Toto on the radio? My arm was not my own, and in a matter of seconds, the dial cranked further to the right until I was belting out the words with about as much gusto as you might expect from an SNL skit.

It wasn't until I hit my high, "I've got some brains down in AfffRICA!! (I've got some brains.) Gonna take some time to do the things I never haaaaa aaaa aaaa aaaa aaadddd! Wooo ooooooo" that I noticed a group of African American foot commuters staring at me with what can only be described as terror and bewilderment that I realized how lost I had gotten into my moment. The light flickered to green, and I sped off into the sunset with my single headlight, amused by the permanent damage I'd just caused to those innocent gentleman and anxious to see where the weekend might take me.

As the photo technician at CVS pharmacy might say, it's the little things in life. Yes, yes it is.

All you need is [Marcus] love

The past month of my 20-something life has been trying, positioning me among several rather difficult situations and on many occasions plainly pissing me off. Which makes those little moments that are so simple and plainly uncomplicated so precious.

[So what this took me a week to share!] #MarcusTherapy #LoveComesinShadesofRed #ILostMyHeartinOhio

Cavemen and Modern Day Man: Are we that different?

It was one of the last few nights Imraan and I had together, marking the tail end of nearly three weeks of what had been a trying time, and in the end, a time that felt more comfortable than not. It was the time of year in Phoenix that three weeks meant the difference between debilitating heat and crisp desert nights.  And on this particular lovely evening, we sat at the dinner table clicking away at our respective computers. We should have been on the patio, taking in the late-summer breeze, but that’s beside the point.

“What are your thoughts on evolution?” Imraan asked me over the top of his screen.

I’ve not been very eloquent lately in my ability to regurgitate information from any number of articles I follow online, smart podcasts I regularly tune-into, or more often, thoughts I’ve formed shortly thereafter.  I responded with a grunt and a cop-out answer.

“I think it’s a thing.” I continued my focus on the computer, clicking away on my keyboard.

Imraan pressed, per the usual. “I want to know how you feel about it, sweets. What do you think happened in particular?” He switched his gaze from his laptop screen to me.

“I think… um… that it’s a real thing, yeah. That, you know… giraffes once had shorter necks and stretched to reach things up high. Eventually, over years and years, they adapted to their surroundings, developed more desirable traits… then all the sudden, they all had long necks…”

Imraan interjected, “Wrong! Let me tell you sweets, because I took a class on this, what really happened…”

I took a class on slapping you… I mumbled to myself.

… “You see, it’s not that the animals adapted to the surroundings, or that the humans adapted to the environments either. What happened, is that humans and animals that randomly were born with more environmentally or situationally desirable traits survived over the others! So, for instance, the horse that was randomly born with a long neck began to access food better than the other horses. Over time, it became what we know as a giraffe! It wasn’t that they evolved to get longer necks over time!”

I sat totally unamused, cross-legged at the table glaring at him. “So, let me get this clear… you asked for my opinion on evolution… just to tell me you knew the answer, and to make me feel like a moron?”

Imraan looked shocked. “No, sweets. No. I just thought it was an interesting point of note. I was reading here, you see...”

He went on for a while until we diverged onto a related topic, one I found quite interesting finally, which had us examining parts on our own bodies that assumedly used to be worthwhile, but that in the 21^st century seem ridiculous. I suggested fingernails. We don’t dig. Imraan suggested ear lobes and the appendix. Input from my friends and family – frequent blogger focus groups of two and three - brought arm-pit hair and facial hair into the mix. Personally, I’ve always regarded hair’s purpose as one to protect from dirt, dust, or in some cases to block sweat from vital parts (think eyebrows). But my peers bring up relevant points – from what are we protecting our arm-pits? Our cheeks and chins? And… ear lobes?

Has mankind evolved so little since cavemen that we still posses traits suited for digging and clawing? Maybe I should start digging and clawing again? Using my earlobes as devices to perhaps carry water buckets (they did recently remove water coolers from my office complex)?

I welcome input on other unneccesary body parts so I may also find a way to incorporate into my daily life. Pictures will inevitably ensue.

If this doesn't make you want to visit Iceland...

...you might be an unfun individual. 

Iceland - added to my list.